A small note from the authors
Warning! This fanfiction could seriously mine your mental sanity.
Theese useless words o prefaction are indeed useless
We simply wanted to tell you a couple of things about what you are going to read...
- It is mainly based on Evangelion.
- It should contain no spoiler for who has seen at least the tenth episode
- While reading you will notice some change inthe writing style it is because who got the control of the keyboard
also took control of the fanfiction (It's always evident from what happens and who gets exalted and who gets demeaned)
- You can contact us at our mail
Jolan-Tru cloudstrf@usa.net
Bahamuttone Aka Wu wu@bahamuttone.net
Karsten karsten@alexandria.cc
NOTE: Jolan-Tru is also known as CLOUDSTRIFE (Persuade him to change nick!)
NOTE2: Jolan-Tru is listed as MIA at the moment.
- We feel to thanks:
Jolan Tru for not having done anything noticeable to be inserted into the fanfic.
Windows 98 for giving a sense to Jolan Tru.
Microsoft for creating Windows 98
Bill Gates for having founded the Microsoft
Karsten's new keyboard for not writing Bahamuttone with only one t
Windigo for not being around.
Dynamic Italia for allowing us to surpass the VHS writing the fanfic.......
Mum AsukaSoryu Langley Hibiki for her devotion to the Holy Phallic Symbol Cult...
Some boring stuff.
- Evangelion is a property of Gainax as all the characters, I don't know who owns the USA licence...
- The Characters of Karsten, Bahamuttone, Jolan-Tru are our copyright;
Every infraction to this copyright will be punished with a big stick
- The SoulEdge come from the omonimous game of Namco and are a copyright of Namco
- Nobody is allowed to modify this file! But you can give it to whomever you know...
Comunicazioni in Italiano
Comunicazioni in Inglese
comunicazioni tra Eva
comunicazioni via radio
Episode 2 (o 7...): ASUKA STRIKES!!!!!
Five days has passed since the battle against the big cube.[Yeah I know it in an octhaedron
but it's easier to call it cube NdBaha]
Karsten has almost healed from the wounds he has got in his heroic intervention
(Yeeeesh... Heroic... he got beaten after two thousandth of second...NdBaha).
Inside an apartment,All appears calm
The door of the apartment of our heroes (coff,coff) is unhinged by a superhuman strenght while a scream
rip apart Bahamuttone eardrums...
Bahamuttone, recovering from the acoustic trauma, recognizes what that scream said.
A lone word...
SHINJI!!!!
Bahamuttone: Ops I think he has got the time to see that VHS
Soul Karsten: I'm going, i kill him and I'm back.
Bahamuttone: The captain is there too...
Soul Karsten: Soul Edge! Go and kill him.
The Soul Edge start moving...
Bahamuttone: and then you get on the contraption!
The Soul Edge jerk to a stop and fall to earth, meanwhile Karsten pales and turns to normal.
Misato appears on the still smoking doorway...
Misato: Guys! What happened to the door?
Both: Hello Captain....
Bahamuttone: Ehm, Nothing just a defective alarm...
Misato staring at the two meter and a half hole: You sure?
Bahamuttone: Yes, Jolan isn't really good with dissipating paste... usually he use mistakenly the plastic explosives...
Misato: Jolan? But hasn't he installed MY alarm also?
Karsten while he hides the Soul Edge:By the way whe he gets back from Germany?
Misato: In about ten days... What are those things you are hiding there?
Karsten: Don't worry I've already got them registered and they even have a tag...
Bahamuttone: About what do you want to talk to us?
Misato: I'd like you to come for dinner so we can speak about certain things. It will be ok at eight.
Both: Okay
Bahamuttone working out some date: We are lucky, it's Shinji's turn in the kitchen...
Karsten: Mhh.
Bahamuttone: Do you want to eat the things cooked by the captain?
Karsten is not answering because he is busy with the Soul Edge...
Karsten to the Soul Edge: You stay here and keep watch. If someone try to enter behead him. If it is Shinji Immolate him beforehand.
Bahamuttone: Don't forget to exclude us from the beheadable...Those two are giving me the creeps
Karsten: I'm safe...
Bahamuttone taking a seals pack: Me too...
8:00 P.M.
Bahamuttone and Karsten knock on Misato's door.
Shinji opens the door
Bahamuttone: Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?
Shinji: Miss Misato has given me change because tomorrow she has the night shift
Karsten shakes with NERVousness.
Bahamuttone shakes with terror.
Shinji lets the two auxiliary pilot in.
Bahamuttone: I've got a bad feeling
Karsten in a low voice: She can't damage the beer.
Bahamuttone: Right.
Shinji finish setting up the table and Misato arrives.
The food seems edible.
Unfortunately it only seems.
Karsten with measured gesture makes some space into the plate and drowns the curry rice with the beer
Shinji stares marveled.
Karsten notices Shinji's stare: It's a famous Italian recipe; Curry rice with beer.
Bahamuttone: I thought it was Austrian. However it's good. Especially if you drink a couple of liter of beer beforehand.
Misato: Let's get to the point. Bahamuttone! From tomorrow we will start your synchrony test!
Bahamuttone paralyzed: And the entry plug?
Misato: After five months of project and three prototypes it's ready.
Bahamuttone: Oh what a wonderful thing! ;_;
Misato: By the way there is another good news! Given the enormous synchrony rate reached by Karsten, the technician have worked for days on the lcb.
Both: lcB ???
Misato: Yes, link connect BEER !!!
Karsten: !!!
Bahamuttone: I hope they have got the Douglas
Misato: with this new
LCB Karsten too has to retake the synchrony test. We hope to take him to 80%!
Bahamuttone: But the newb... ehm Shinji doesn't seem idoneous
Misato: Yes so he will still use the same LCL. Happy Karsten? Now you two are pilots for
real!
Misato gives the two the pilot ID cards. Karsten tries to forget
drowning into the beer Bahamuttone passing the Du demon : Look for forgetting
you need a couple of hundred liter of Yebisu Shinji: Well now that we are
all pilot we should get to know each other better The two look at
Shinji. Karsten in a low voice to Bahamuttone: It can be fun. Bahamuttone:
I don't think so. Karsten: Dear Shinji, you are really right! Saying this
he gives Shinji a Karsten friendly' smash on the shoulder making him fly over the
table. Karsten thinking about Rei: Since we are all pilots shouldn't we live
all together? Bahamuttone: It seems to me a really bad idea Misato looks
really wondered by the idea . Karsten: this could help us in case of
synchronous action with more than one unit and will strengthen the bonds among
the pilots Bahamuttone: And you want bonds with that newbie? Kar you have
drank too much Karsten: I'm perfectly sober. Misato even more wondered:
I'll talk about it with commander Ikari. The two takes leave. Karsten
after closing the door: YEEEAH!
Morning Bahamuttone is still at his hobby Bahamuttone
stares incredulously at the monitor. Karsten looking at Bahamuttone: Ehi Baha
what's happened? Bahamuttone points to the monitor. Karsten sees the
Captain Misato Katsuragi in high uniform at seven o'clock in the
morning!!! Karsten stares incredulously now at the screen now at the (first)
can of beer he is drinking. Karsten: What strange stuff has gotten into this
Yebisu can? Bahamuttone shaking out: Ah, today there is the presentation of
the Jet Alone! Karsten: Boh, what is it? However we have got the synchrony
test with the lcb; move out! Bahamuttone: If it turn out right we will not
need them anymore. The Jet Alone is a strange thing alike an Eva but is remote
controlled and has a nuclear reactor inside, neat isn't it? Karsten is
already down the stairs.
Lunch time Inside of a really strange entry
plug. Bahamuttone: Damn it's still too little. Karsten: You should have expected that they would not have enlarged the
Eva Bahamuttone: Really funny Kar! In the initial design the Eva
were really more massive! Maya:You have ended the test
aboard both Eva you can get out now Makoto stares at the connection
results of the two pilots
Pilot |
Unit 00 |
Unit 01 |
Karsten |
85% |
76% |
Bahamuttone |
80% |
53% |
Misato:Bahamuttone Bahamuttone: Captain! Already
back? How has the presentation gone? Misato:There was an
accident, get ready to depart Karsten with an evil grin: good
luck Bahamuttone panicking: What, I have to depart, with what, why,
where? Misato: The Jet Alone has gone out of control and we
must stop it before it melts down Bahamuttone: But I've got the worst
synchrony rates! Misato: I know, but we haven't got the
time to change the entry plug! Don't complain Bahamuttone: Sigh all
right...
Inside of a cargo plane
Misato: Bahamuttone you have to stop the Jet Alone while I
board it and shut down the reactor manually Bahamuttone: It's really necessary to risk personally? Shouldn't be better to hit
it with an N2 from a distance? Misato: We are too
near a town and if the reactor explodes we will have a radioactive fall
out. Bahamuttone: Understood, but will that thin
suit be effective enough? I'm really dubious Misato:Don't worry, we have to get down in really short, get
ready Bahamuttone: Roger
The Eva-01 is launched from the plane Bahamuttone: Let's hope it will hold
together The Eva lands heavily in front of the Jet Alone end shoulder it
The jet alone falls ignominiously still rivolto walking' Misato enter a
maintenance port. I the meantime Bahamuttone tries to keep the jet alone
still Bahamuttone: Do you think they'll get angry if I
break it a bit? Karsten: It could short
out Bahamuttone:then I'll only knot it
up Misato is tinkering with an internal terminal which seem ignore her
completely
The Eva autonomy timer marks 00:25:56 Bahamuttone: Shit.. I'm running out
of power The forewarned explosion timer marks 00:30:00 Bahamuttone: that
is even more worrying... A communication windows pops open. Karsten eating
popcorn inside the Eva 00 entry plug: Baha do you know that
Makoto says that the if the Eva runs out of power before the explosion it could
not resist it? Bahamuttone: Thanks for the comfort. Before I could
always be hoping... By the way how come the popcorn aren't floating
around? Karsten:7...6...5 Bahamuttone: Captain hurry
up... Misato meanwhile is trying to put the control bar back by
hand... Karsten 2...1 The control bar go back inside
without an apparent cause Bahamuttone: what a close call
Morning Bahamuttone is still at his hobby Bahamuttone: Today is all
normal. The captain is a myth as usual Shinji is dumber as
ever. Karsten: I'm wrong or has she woken up two hour
earlier? Bahamuttone: It's right. Who knows..? The doorbell
rings Bahamuttone: I've got a bad feeling Karsten: Should I
answer? Bahamuttone: Ok... Karsten answers the door and lets in the
captain. Bahamuttone: Good morning Captain, what takes you at us so early in
the morning? Misato: Since because the evacuation a good chunk of
teacher has gone out and you have nothing to do and you have got a minimum of
qualifications you are hired as teacher. Karsten: wow without a comma. Ehm,
I' can't teach! In the secondary school they don't do Chemistry. Bahamuttone:
And what would you make me teach? Hacking technique? Misato: Well, here they
do chemistry in the secondary and Bahamuttone would teach Foreign
Languages. Bahamuttone: that is? Misato: English and Italian. Karsten:
Bahamuttone teaching Italian...... Bahamuttone: Ehm... Misato: Well you will
start today. Bahamuttone: How has this idea got out? Misato: Well from the
high ups the judged your results too low and so Bahamuttone: Too low? But if
we have quadruplicated our synchrony rates in the last week! Misato: Yes but
the bureaucracy is a bit slow so this order should be of about a months
ago. Karsten: So it should last little.. Misato: Well the orders talk
about the whole scholastic season Karsten: A quadrimester? Misato: Here
in Japan the school functions by season so you should be there for about 7
months. Bahamuttone is catatonic Misato: You should hurry or you'll be
late. The two start toward the school
First Neo-Tokyo 3 Secondary School
Classroom 2-A
Teacher: I have got to introduce you... The whole class turns
around. Whispers: two new students no they are too old they don't seem
Japanese yeah that's right we will joke them all day Bahamuttone is taking
notes about who comments. Shinji to himself: What are those two doing
here The teacher goes on: the substitutes of your chemistry and foreign
languages teacher. Class: WHAAAAT!!!!! Shinji: Yeah, so I'll get certainly
good marks! Kensuke: What, do you know them? Shinji: yes but it's a long
story. class chief: Guys Silence! Teacher: You will start with
English. Bahamuttone under his breath: Yeah. Teacher: Prof... Mr
Bahamuttone... Good bye. The teacher exits Karsten stays Bahamuttone:
Well... Since I've jut arrived I think it's appropriate to introduce myself. My
name is Bahamuttone but you'll call me simply Sir since I haven't got any
academical title. Karsten grins Bahamuttone: Since I don't know where you
are, I'll get you a marvelous surprise test. Which obviously will count toward
end year results. evil grin Class: It's unfair...let's
hope it's easy...what a pain... Bahamuttone: I will not accept any complaint
from the pupils; If you have got any you can tell the class chief about it who
then will refer to me. class chief terminal starts beeping. : Sir the
class asks if we can skip the test since we are not prepare
enough. Bahamuttone: Refused, is there anything else? Karsten getting away
from the wall: Look, you should not lose so much time, else you will have only
half an hour for the test class chief: Sir, the time used in the discussion
will not count toward the test result, will it? Bahamuttone: Well my
chronograph marks the quarter, so you have still 45 minutes to finish the test.
Every question without answer will count as wrong. The class start
alacritously answering the test. After ten minutes a worried look appear on
most student's face. Karsten: I'll give you five minutes of my
hour. Bahamuttone in a low voice: I don't think it will be of any
use Karsten in a low voice: Yeah but so I seems magnanimous Bahamuttone:
I thought so.. However that is the admission test for the Tokyo
university. On Shinji's terminal appear a call signal Shinji
answers Nadia: * Do you know them? * Shinji: * Yes * Bahamuttone under
his breath: He will never learn... Nadia * Who are them? * Shinji: * They
are two pilots * Nadia: * Pilots? They too board the Eva? * Shinji * Yes,
but I'm better... * Bahamuttone under his breath: Now he is going out of the
limits.. Kensuke: * Really? I thought only 14 year old could pilot
them Karsten: * Rocque, Ikari, Aida since you have got the time to
chat; you'll not need the 5 minutes from my hour. * Bahamuttone: I've
got to show you something: it's not so smart to chat by terminal during a test.
I'm forced to void yours. If Shinji would have not responded all would be
right. Driiiiin Bahamuttone: I'm sorry but the time is finished. Give me
your test; You have 35 seconds, those who are late will get a penalty of the
late seconds.
Bahamuttone once received all the test leave the desk to Karsten Not before giving 55 page of the literature book for the day
after.
Karsten: Hello I'm Karsten and I am your new chemistry teacher... Any
question? Class chief: the class asks if those are really your
names Karsten: Obviously not! We don't use our real names since we got in
Japan given that we were really annoyed at how the were mangled. Other
questions? Class Chief: Do you want too to run a test ? Karsten: No one
test is tiring enough. The class breathes in relief. Karsten: However I
still have to know how far you are so I'll do some question here and
there. Bahamuttone: Relax he is not mean, I don't think he will give you a
mark. Karsten let's see who I can call to the black board Class chief:
Our teacher don't call at the black board usually. Karsten: Really? But I'm
not a teacher... Well Aida and Rocque to the black board. Kensuke:
jeez... Nadia: let's hope... Karsten: Relax.. then Aida let's see... tell
me. the Broensted theory. Kensuke: The substance which in water releases H+
ion are acid and those which releases OH- ion are bases. Karsten: Good Aida,
let's see Roque. Karsten: Write on the blackboard the formulas of cicloesano
and benzene. Nadia executes without hesitations. Karsten very well but you
have forgotten a double link these are thing you have done recently, aren't
they? Nadia: Yes. Karsten: Good, now let's call another two... Suzuhara and
Ikari. The two boys get up and walks toward the blackboard Karsten: Let's
start with Suzuhara who seems the most nervous. Write the structure formula
of water Toji hesitates a bit then writes a big H2O on the
blackboard. Shinji looks at the blackboard with a useless look . Karsten:
Good Suzuhara, try to stay calm, ok? Toji nods. Karsten: Now Shinji... let's
see... since you are SO GOOD your question will be a bit more complex... Weeellll
write on the blackboard the formula of the 3,3-dimetil 4-cloro 5-6 ottene and
make a synthesis project from benzene. Shinji: What?(why does he call me by
first name?) Bahamuttone is laughing Karsten: Mmh? What you don't know it?
Bah let's get on... Shinji: something easier? Karsten: Uhhhm. It seemed
easy to me... let's see... Bahamuttone! You are not a chemistry expert! Make you
the question! Bahamuttone: let' see write me the structure formulae of
Carbon Monoxide Shinji: C-O? Karsten: Exact! Now write the formulae on
the black board and you can return to your seat. Shinji writes
C=O| Karsten: there are electrons missing... well go to your seat...
so...Suzuhara, Roque, Aida a +... Shinji an E Shinji But you have said that you
would not have given marks! Karsten: yes but your was longer so I' can trait
it as a full blown interrogation Shinji goes back to his seat. Chatter:
this one seem more human... yeah... but not with Shinji Karsten borrows a
textbook from Hikari and begin to explain some new stuff The bell
rings Class chief: Stand... Bow The teacher gets in from the
door Teacher: Ah you have no more lesson today and can leave the
school. Karsten towards Bahamuttone: Beer? Bahamuttone: MMh.
OK! Karsten: Professor would you come with us? Teacher: No, no! I've got
some work in the library Karsten: then see you tomorrow. The two new
teacher leaves the school
A week later An helicopter flies over the pacific ocean.
Kensuke: Mythicmythicmythic The inside of the helicopter seems a bit
crowded in order we see Misato Kensuke with his omnipresent video camera
filming everything Shinji Toji with a new cap Karsten and Bahamuttone
wedged in the back. Bahamuttone: Why I always have to be in places one third
too small than me ? Karsten: And why I always have to be next to you
? Misato: Stop complaining you two! Karsten: Captain why have you invited
us too? Misato: Because there is Jolan Bahamuttone: Understood.... Toji
is fibrillating because he thinks he is on a date with the captain Kensuke is
fibrillating because of the junk flotilla on which they are going to
land Shinji is beaten by Kensuke and Toji with friendship and by Karsten and
Bahamuttone with Purpose. The group lands on the sky carrier. The wind
from the helicopter makes Toji's cap float away. Bahamuttone: how
can... Kensuke: Mythicmythicmythic Toji's cap rolls on the bridge while
Toji runs after it Bahamuttone: Ever more idiot, it's evident he is always
with Shinji Karsten to Kensuke: On Monday I'll ask you all the
program. Kensuke: Mythicmythicmythic Bahamuttone: You are taking
advantage, eh? The cap after a long run stops on a foot. Toji seems happy
and start to collect the cap The foot rises and stomp on the cap Toji
panics and tries to get the cap out from under the foot. Girl stepping on
Toji's cap: Hello Captain Katsuragi. Karsten and Bahamuttone turn around
interested Misato: Hello Asuka I see you have grown up. Asuka: And not
only in height A blow of wind rises Asuka's skirt. We hear the sound of
three slap. Bahamuttone: I'll not try it. Kar is dangerous. Karsten gives
an evil stare at Asuka Asuka doesn't seem impressed. Bahamuttone grabs
Asuka and pin her under one arm Bahamuttone: You should stay calm, Kar uses
the swords when he gets angry and he is dangerous Shot on Kar on SoulKarsten
with the Soul Edge that revolves around. Misato is looking another
way.. Bahamuttone: Understood? Asuka nods even if she is still
angry Bahamuttone let Asuka go and Karsten reverts to normal, Misato turns
back Misato: Karsten you must be wrong there is nothing there. Shinji: Why
you have slapped us? Asuka: it was the price for what you have
seen. Kensuke Mythicmythicmythic Shinji: Why those two don't
pay? Bahamuttone: Since we are taller from our angle of view we can't have
seen her blue slip. Shinji seems perplexed, something in the words of
Bahamuttone doesn't seem right Toji: I can show you the same thing so we are
even. Toji pulls down his trouser......SLAP! Bahamuttone: Yes he is passing
way too much time with Shinji Karsten: I disagree, Shinji would not have done
it. Bahamuttone: But Shinji is without backbone. Misato: Ehm I introduce
you Asuka Soryu Langley the Second Children Asuka: Who is the so spoken of
Third Children? He's not that one Misato pointing to Shinji: No it's
him. Asuka: And so you are a good for nothing Bahamuttone: The girl shows
promises, she has got it at once Meanwhile Karsten is busy putting the soul
edge back into the pocket, but it seems he has got some problem Bahamuttone:
It like the sea stirs them Misato: Karsten, Bahamuttone give an eye to the
boys. Misato take off towards the command bridge. Asuka: But who are you
two? Shinji tries answering but is stopped by a blow from
Karsten Bahamuttone with a professional look: We are not authorized to
divulge information to those extraneous to NERV. Asuka: But I am one of the
NERV! I'm the Second Children! Bahamuttone: Show as the card. Asuka fish
out a NERV ID card which Bahamuttone promptly put into his
laptop. Bahamuttone: Uhm, Ok it's not fake. You can take it
back. Bahamuttone: Ehi Kar, should we tell her? Karsten: That she doesn't
know us really bothers me. it's better she asks someone else WHO ISN'T
SHINJI. Bahamuttone: Well till five minutes ago neither us did know
her.... Asuka is every second more perplexed Karsten: well We are the
Auxiliary pilot. Bahamuttone: If someone is rendered inoperative we
go. Karsten: With inoperative he means with more than 10 mayor bone broken or
dead Asuka: Ah Misato comes back from the bridge a bit
shaken. Misato: Let's go, the lunch is ready. Bahamuttone looking at the
elevator: It seems a bit small... Misato: We will make two travel At
lunch Misato, Bahamuttone and Karsten are drinking beer. Someone hugs
Misato from behind (Windigo turns in his tomb) Misato: Rh Asuka: Mr
Kaji! Kaji: You still drink beer at lunch, so your stomach will
inflate! Misato jumps out of the chair dropping it. Misato: What are you
doing here? Kaji: I'm here to escort Asuka.... It's a long time no
see Karsten steal Misato's beer Asuka catches Kaji's arm. Kaji: You
are Shinji, right? Shinji: Eh?, Yes but how can you know my name? Kaji:
Nothing to marvel about you are pretty famous, don't you know? Those two also
even if for other motives Kaji quickly resumes the action of the three :
Shinji is the boy who has defeated three angels without training Asuka: and
the other two? Kaji: both have got some incredible synchronic rate;
Bahamuttone has stopped an out of control automata Karsten has survived a direct
hit form a particle beam and a launch with empty lungs Asuka: what do you
mean with incredible synchronic rate? Kaji: an increase from 12% to 85 % in
three days. Asuka stare the two incredulously Kaji: By the way do you
still live with Katsuragi, don't you? Shinji: Indeed Kaji: Listen, could
you tell me if she still turn around so much while asleep? The question rise
a bit of confusion. Kensuke: (mythicmythicmythic) Bahamuttone: She must
still turn around............ My seismograph goes awry every night ( Fiuu I've patched
it....) All stares to Bahamuttone, Karsten steals Bahamuttone's beer The
situation returns to normal Bahamuttone and Misato take their beer and notice
they are empty Both look at Karsten Karsten: Why me? She is
German! Bahamuttone: She hasn't your ability in the arcane art of beer
transmigration through the cans Asuka: Wow he know the mythic technique of
beer transmigration through the cans Karsten: Nordic parents Bahamuttone
is draining the five liters barrel which Karsten has smuggled
aboard. Bahamuttone: But... it shouldn't have been here Jolan too? He has had
to bring us three hundred liters of German beer! Asuka: You know that
element?! Kaji: Jolan is downstairs peeling potatoes. Bahamuttone: Where
has he thrown out all the money this time? Kaji: he has tried opening the
Eva-02 Control panel, Asuka is still angry about that Asuka: He has changed
all the system setting, and the EVA started saying that the system resources
were low and that Windows 98 had become unstable Karsten: as should be
expected.. Bahamuttone: Really like Jolan...... I'll have to remember to keep him
away from my computer... Ah Karsten I'm becoming favorable to your idea, you
know? Karsten: wonders why....
An explosion announces the arrival of the sixth angel. Karsten and
Bahamuttone shoots to the bridge. Toji and Kensuke are already
there. Kensuke: Mythicmythicmythic Speaker: Eva-02 active. Bahamuttone:
She is crazy! On the transport ship there isn't alimentation, she has one minute
of power at most! Captain: Who has given authorization? The Eva jumps away
from the cargo just in time to avoid the angel and lands on a ship Misato:
You have 58 seconds left Asuka: know get the external
alimentation ready on the bridge. Shinji: Shall we
jump? Bahamuttone: Is also Shinji there?!!!!!! The Eva starts
jumping from ship to ship until it gets on the sky carrier, where it connects to
the external power supply. The Eva takes out the progressive knife cutter Bahamuttone: since when the Eva are armed with
chancellery stuff? Misato: ... The angel jumps on the bridge and bites the
Eva diving again into the water with the Eva still in the mouth Bahamuttone:
we have gone fishing with a bait that costs too much Misato glares at
Bahamuttone Bahamuttone: Without the Type D equipment I'm dubious that they
can do anything The situation seems at a stall (So Kaji flees with a VTOL)
The angel has got the Unit 02 between the teeth and is carrying around the whole
sky carrier Jolan getting out from a trapdoor on the floor: what damn is
going on? Bahamuttone: Look at who has jumped out! What are you doing
there? Karsten: Hello Jolan. Jolan: I was trying to get out of the
kitchen... Misato: However Bahamuttone's idea is not bad. Misato: Asuka
don't get away from there for any reason. Asuka: Wha? Misato explains her plan: sink two ship and get them
inside the angel mouth to shot the nucleus point blank. The captain is a bit
perplexed by the idea but agrees. Misato: Shinji, Asuka make the angel opens
its mouth! The synchrony index jumps up. The two destroyer enter the
angel's mouth and destroy it. The Eva lands on the bridge of the ship thrown
by the explosion On landing Shinji is ridiculed for the plug suit he
wears.
Morning First Neo-Tokyo 3 Secondary School Classroom 2-A
Toji: I really would not be in your shoes, she is really
unbearable. Shinji: It's true. Toji: Luckily I'll not see her
again. The door to the classroom opens and Asuka enters with the
teacher. Teacher: I have to introduce you your new classmate. Asuka:
Hello. I'm Asuka Soryu Langley Teacher: Your English teacher will arrive
shortly. The teacher exits In the class a lot of comments about Asuka's
look are heard. Shortly Bahamuttone and Karsten enter the class Class
chief: Stand. Asuka: Why? Class chief : Bow Bahamuttone: Easily enough
because I am the one who can give you bad marks in English evil grin Asuka: You? But if I'm better at
English! Bahamuttone: That is really probable #But I'm your teacher and you
are the pupil# understood?
#said in English#
Karsten: Do you have done all the homework I've given you, haven't
you? Asuka: You also? Karsten: Obviously, and I teach chemistry Asuka
is catatonic Bahamuttone: Langley come here. Asuka goes near the
teacher's desk Bahamuttone gives Asuka a plastic card Bahamuttone: This is
your new ID Card, you can return to your seat. At the end of the day the
group finds Misato outside the school Misato: Karsten your proposal was
accepted, from today all the pilots will live together under my
supervision. All return back home
Bahamuttone: aren't we a bit too many for one apartment? Misato: Yes so
it's necessary to restructure a couple of apartments Karsten: If it's only to
open a pair of door can't do it I? Misato looks at Karsten Karsten: just
tell me which are the apartment and I'll make the door Bahamuttone: Trust him
he knows what he is doing. Jolan: Hello Am I transferred here? Misato: no
you are in the third district. There Karsten to Bahamuttone: Should I try an
Omnislash or let the Soul Edge do the work? Bahamuttone: Better let the
sword... The Omnislash is dangerous Bahamuttone to Jolan: The third district
is empty so you can enjoy yourself. Karsten lets out Asuka and Rei and then
closes himself inside. A lot of strange noises like chain saws or pneumatic
hammer are heard. Karsten exits covered with dust. Karsten: Ialle ve to make
it in a hurry so it's not so refined Entering the apartment we see columns,
arcs, Greek style statues, and an enormous mosaic on the floor. Bahamuttone:
and you have made it in a hurry...... mmmmh there is only one bedroom I see really interesting Karsten: ...... Misato: I'm your
supervisor. Jolan: every now and then she will have the night
shift.. Misato: yes but there are the cameras Bahamuttone: to get a
change we will make turns first the girls and then the guys. (there are the
cameras ^^). The girls go to the bathroom Bahamuttone goes to his
terminal Bahamuttone: Well camera five. Karsten: Shinji go to the corner
shop and buy some beers Shinji: Which corner shop? The nearest is ten
kilometers away. Karsten: That one! Take my bike.. Shinji: But
I... SoulKarsten: You are going, ain't ya? Shinji: Y...yes I'm
going.... Shinji departs. Karsten: Ok we have got him out Baha how is it
going? Bahamuttone: Bad the camera lenses aren't anti fog... Jolan what kind of
junk you have given me? Jolan has gone away five minutes ago. Bahamuttone:
Tomorrow he will see The girls exit the bathroom
The morning after First Neo-Tokyo 3 Secondary School
Park
Kensuke: Ahh, All are saying Asuka Asuka only because the photos do not show
her bad attitude. Toji to another student: Yes they are 300 yen apiece, it's
not much. Kensuke: and you will be the only one having them Bahamuttone
from behind: What are you two doing? Kensuke and Toji hiding Asuka's photos:
N...nothing. Bahamuttone: I've heard that you are swindling your schoolmates
selling them photos of a pilot, do you know it's a felony punishable by the
martial court? Toji: ?_? Kensuke: EEHHHHHHHhhh... Bahamuttone: For half
the income we could shut an eye Toji: Why we should do it? Karsten
showing two photos: else I'll give these two to Asuka Voice from behind: What
do you have to give me? Bahamuttone: Gone an easy way to make
money. Karsten: the notes that you don't have because you weren't
here Asuka: uhmm they seems to be more than two. And you two what are you
hiding there? Toji and Kensuke: Who? Us? Nothing.... Asuka advancing: Let me
see.... Karsten: Well let her see Bahamuttone: 70% and I'll save you
Karsten: Well let her see Bahamuttone: 70% and I'll save you Toji:
Never! Kensuke gives Bahamuttone the 70% of their incomes Bahamuttone: but
they are only 3000 Yen for such an amount I can't protect you. Asuka is
surfing trough Kensuke's binder Asuka: Uhmm... Interesting... You owe me 35.000
yen for the photographic rights. Toji: ma...ma Kensuke: what if we refuse
to pay? Asuka: you'll have to discuss con my manager, he is red and has four
eyes Toji and Kensuke say good bye to their savings Karsten and
Bahamuttone go to the beer shop for two large beer with the money just
earned
Bahamuttone: Ehi Kar it seems there is an angel. Karsten: How can you
tell? Bahamuttone: They have seen a thing fifty meter long, they lose time
doing wave analysis, I bet that it's an angel. Karsten beeper start
beeping Bahamuttone: You have left it on? Karsten: Damn the batteries and
NERV neither reimburse us Bahamuttone: It seems they want to send Asuka and
the newbie. Karsten: But we still have to get there, right? Bahamuttone
draining the mug: Unfortunately yes The two start towards the base. NERV
Operative center, Misato: About time you arrive! Bahamuttone: What fault
do I have if it has taken me about twenty minutes breaking down the access
port. Misato: breaking down...Why do you have to break it down? Bahamuttone:
it doesn't accept my badge anymore. Misato: let's drop it... we have decide to
attack the angel on the coast so to spare damage to the city. Asuka and Shinji
have already departed. Karsten: We will see it on the maxi screen
here Bahamuttone ha already placed two chairs and the
popcorn Misato... The two Eva are shoot out from ramp R 26 The attach to
the external power supply and go out into the sea Asuka complains being
together with Shinji Karsten seeing the halberd: I want a two handed
sword. The angel gets out of water. Misato: Start the attack! Asuka
I'm going, you cover me Shinji: cover you? Eva-02 goes to assault Eva-01 open a cover
fire without conviction Asuka KYAAAHHH!!! Asuka
jumps and with a halberd strike cut the angel in half. Misato: Perfect:
Good work Asuka Karsten: Sh*t Bahamuttone: in two days we are
fired Asuka: it wasn't an enemy at my
level Bahamuttone: she brings herself bad luck Shinji: Asuka it still moves! Asuka: Eh Misato: What Bahamuttone: I've said that The
angel regenerates in two distinct entities The two angels attack the
Eva Shinji goes berserk and start shooting like a fool Bahamuttone: As
usual, he only waste ammo, with what they cost Asuka keep her cool and
strikes the angel's nucleus. The angel regenerates the nucleus and send the
Eva-02 to the fields and Eva-01 in the middle of the sea
Asuka and Shinji come back to the base A resume of the battle is
projected Voice :Today at 15 hour 58 minutes and 15 seconds the Eva-01 02
have stopped functioning after being attacked by the 7th angel split into two
unit. Voice: 16 hour and 3 minutes NERV abandon the operation. The authority
goes to the second military division of the united nation. Long shot of the
room At the projector there is Jolan-Tru In the back past the
command desk there are Fuyutsuki standing, Gendo balancing on only one hand,
Karsten Soul glued' to Rei. In the second row of seat sit Kaji, covered by a
balloon, Misato, at a noticeable distance from Kaji, Ritsuko. In the first
row there are Shinji Bahamuttone and Asuka. Voice: 16 hour 5 minutes the
angel is attacked with N2 bombs Bahamuttone: Well at least it will stay put
for a bit.... Voice the 0.28% of the mass of the objectives is successfully
incinerated Bahamuttone: What? The 0.28%, it'll take half an hour to
regenerate what we will do? Misato: No the calculus show that it will take
about five days. Meanwhile on the wall it appears a blue screen with written
windows 98 irreversible error Karsten: What has windows to do with a
projector' Jolan is whacking the projector which seems not
stopping. Bahamuttone: Aren't five days a bit too many? Misato: don't you
trust the Magi? Jolan: Magi? Where I've seen this name... Ah that terminal on
which I've installed my copy of windows 98 Alpha to try it! The only ones to
have heard him are Bahamuttone and Karsten. Bahamuttone and Karsten return
home after a stop ad the beer shop.
Control Center Misato: Well... Are you ready? Bahamuttone: Yes, aren't
you giving us some information, a bit of briefing, something.... Misato: Uhm
Yes go out and keep them busy, ah don't do too much property
damage. Bahamuttone: Ehm.... Is that all? Misato: It's all! Bahamuttone:
At least a decent weapon? Ritsuko: You have got Type B equipment. Karsten:
That is the knife on pills... I want at least Asuka Halberd. Ritsuko: In this
moment is being repaired. I'm sorry. Karsten: Me too Bahamuttone: It seem
really bad to me Karsten: If we make it standing I'll dye my hair
blonde. The two Eva are shoot out. Bahamuttone: How much
time till contact? Maya: At current speed
approximately 15 minutes. Bahamuttone: Got enough
time then Karsten meanwhile is busy crunching together a dozen of
street light post. Misato:KARSTEN WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU
DOING? Karsten: I'm building some kind of two handed
weapon. Karsten is tying the progressive knife to one en of the shaft
of street light post. Bahamuttone hands over his knife too. Bahamuttone takes
a big axe from one of the armed building. Ritsuko: Who has given the
permission to use the Axe? Maya: Here we have got an order from Commander
Ikari's terminal. Ritsuko: If that is so.... Bahamuttone putting away his
laptop: I knew that login would have proven useful Karsten: Bahamuttone find me a two handed sword or I'll shoot cover fire
during the attack Bahamuttone: I doubt you'll accomplish that with the
progressive knife; However take the Axe I'm using the sniper
rifle. Bahamuttone gives the axe to Karsten and takes a big rifle from
another armed building. Ritsuko The sniper rifle too Maya: this too is
authorized by Ritsuko: commander Ikari (to herself) Wasn't he on an SSTO
shuttle Karsten:Captain can I do a bit of practice cutting
down a couple of building? Misato:.... Karsten: Thanks Captain Karsten jumps turn the axe over his head
and cut a building in half. Misato turns to stone Karsten: Even if the
angel is moving it should not be too different Misato repressing her rage:
Karsten I haven't given you any permission Karsten: You know how it is Who
stay silent gives consent...(Or something like that) Maya: The angel are in the
visual range. Bahamuttone:Roger Visual contact
established Bahamuttone:I take the orange
one Karsten:Ok Karsten charges forward,
jumps and hits the angel with a mighty blow. Karsten:
Waaaaaaaaah Bahamuttone meanwhile has hit the other with three shots without
any results. Bahamuttone: Damn... The AT Field of that thing is
incredible Karsten:I noticed that it hasn't even twitched
with that blow The light colored angel go to counterattack and tries
to grab the Eva-01 Karsten dodges and manage to land a placed blow to the
side damaging it. Bahamuttone deciding that from that place he has no hope
surges forward grabbing the improvised halberd, jumps and lands heavily on the
angel point forward, the Edgehalberd' pins the angel to the ground. Bahamuttone:
RUUUUUN! Karsten throws the axe towards the angel
before fleeing Incredibly the axe cuts away an arm to the angel
Command Center General Amazement Maya: the total damage sustained by
the angel is equal to the 20% of the mass. Ritsuko: It's
incredible.... Misato getting over the shock: Karsten, Bahamuttone it was
really............ Good work guys. Karsten and Bahamuttone are already at the
cages. The two changes over. Bahamuttone: So from tomorrow blonde eh? They
have got to give you a new ID-card Karsten: Nah nobody has heard that, and I
want the video of this battle. Misato from outside the door: Karsten I've
booked you an appointment to the barber shop for this evening. Bahamuttone:
Nobody herd eh? Karsten: Let's go drink a beer The two exit the change
room. Outside waiting there are: Misato, Kaji a bit too near Misato, Maya,
Makoto and Fuyutsuki. Fuyutsuki: You have done a really excellent work., Our
compliments, you have got three days of liberties. Kaji: Do you know that
what you have done has something of extraordinary?...... I didn't think you could
manage that. Bahamuttone: But where is Dr Akagi? Maya: She is studying the
battle frame by frame with the synchrony rate and the lcb values. Karsten:
Maya, Makoto what about a round at the beer shop? You have ended the
shift. Maya and Makoto readily accepts Misato joins the group in the
(vain) hope of getting rid of Kaji.
The morning after Karsten and Bahamuttone get back home around 4
AM Karsten enter first. Asuka: Who's there? Karsten half drunk:
I Asuka: Ah a thief! Asuka attacks Karsten who not being in the full
control of his physical and mental faculties (read totally drunk and asleep)
takes in without reaction. Bahamuttone half drunk: Ehi Asuka why are you
beating up Karsten?. Asuka: Karsten? But he is blond, you are really
drunk. A cascade of swear in Italian rises some doubt within
Asuka. Bahamuttone sobered up: He has dyed his hair because we have returned
alive from the mission. Bahamuttone looking at Karsten merrily asleep on the
floor even if a bit beaten. Bahamuttone: Listen where have you learned
fighting that way? You have destroyed him in less than 12
seconds Asuka:... Karsten: ........ What ba**s this music Shinji: What is
all this ruckus? Asuka and Bahamuttone: NOTHING, USELESS THING GET BACK TO
SLEEP!| Bahamuttone The girls seems really bright... this is good. Rei:
Welcome, I've heard that the mission was successful. Shinji and Asuka appear
to be really marveled by this affirmation. Bahamuttone is taking Karsten's
time. Karsten jumps up like a spring. Bahamuttone on the back ground:
Fiuuu 0.0000000001 Seconds he is getting better. Misato: All right guys, you
are happy that the mission was successful, but now GO TO SLEEP since you have to
wake up in two hours. Group: Okaaaay.... 6:30 AM Misato: Well after
breakfast I'll be showing you a film Shinji What film? Karsten asleep:
Firm? What? we are back to Prato? Bahamuttone passing a beer: Drink so you
wake up a bit. Karsten: Thanks. Misato: It is the recording of yesterday
battle between your comrades and the 7th angel Asuka: Who has
fought? Misato: Karsten and Bahamuttone whit exceptional result. Asuka:
There is even the film in of the dyeing of Karsten's hair? Karsten:
NO! Misato simultaneously: yes. Bahamuttone: let's see them that's
better. Ended the movie. Shinji:......... Asuka: Were really you inside
there? I don't believe it or you were really on drugs Bahamuttone: we were
really inside there. By the way do you know that the 02 is really
comforting. Asuka sweat drops. Karsten: and don't try to humor us that I
still remember yesterday beating. Rei: You have fought really
well. Karsten has gone overdrive another time. Bahamuttone elbowing
Karsten: Thanks Rei. Karsten with dreamlike voice: Thank you oh sweet
Rei. Bahamuttone: he is really gone nuts Misato However this hasn't put
down the angel, so you still have to keep up the synchrony training. All
except Rei: OH NO!!! Karsten and Bahamuttone: What ba**s this music. xTwo
days later Asuka and Shinji defeat the angel thanks to the synchronous combat
technique, however once the battle is over they start bickering again on who is
the better pilot.
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